What The Best Version Of You Means

Welcome to Expand Your Life Podcast. This is Jc Jones and you’re listening to Episode 28.

Welcome back everyone. I hope you had a great week. Today we’re going to talk about what the best version of you means.

We all know if we’re living our lives according to the best version of ourselves. Whatever the best version of yourself is right now, at this moment.  Some of us are living according to the best version of ourselves, and some of us aren’t. But is it necessary?

Well, no, of course it’s not. It is never necessary to live according to the best version of yourself, or even to figure out what that means to you. It’s completely a personal preference on how you want your life to look and how you want to live your life and how you want to feel.

If you choose the path you’ve always had or the path you’ve always gone down because you value the comfort and stability that that brought you, then that is perfectly fine to continue to live that way. But as you begin to grow and to learn and you have a desire to create something different in your life and you start wanting something more, that’s when you won’t be living according to the best version of yourself any longer.

It’s like Maya Angelou said, “Do the best you can until you know better. Then when you know better, do better.”

So when you start knowing better but continue not to do something better, that is when you’re not living up to your full potential, that is when you are not living according to the best version of you.

So then the best version of you is simply what you become aware of. What you become aware of as far as how you act, how you show up, the direction your life is going, the person you know you can be –  if you put in the effort, the time, and gain the knowledge. That’s the best version of you right now today.

And if your desire is to be that person, then you must take action on that because if you don’t take action on that, you’re not living up to what the best version of you is. Like I said earlier, it’s completely a choice. It doesn’t make you any less of a person or it doesn’t make you a loser. If you choose to continue down the path that you’ve become comfortable with, that is simply a choice.

But on the other hand, if that’s the case, then you really have no right to complain about the results that you have because of that choice. That is a choice that you’ve made. If you’re unhappy or dissatisfied with the results you have in your life, it might be time to reconsider not taking action. It might be time to reconsider staying safe. And figure out if that really is the best path for you.

I know I lived many years of my life, not willing to grow simply out of fear of the unknown and the comfort that I felt where I was. That I at least knew what to expect where I was at, at the time. This, I thought, was better than facing the fear of the unknown. Facing the fear of change.

It wasn’t until how I was living my life became more painful than the fear of the unknown that I started embracing change. That I started to seek out change and even actively look for it.

Not until I saw that my fears had been unfounded, and saw the massive benefits, did I become motivated to continue to grow and to continue to move past those fears.

The best version of me at any given time was dependent on where I was at in my journey. What I had discovered about myself and the things I was learning. The speed of my growth was dependent on how quickly I was willing to break through and break past the things that were holding me back.

As we gain more insight and understanding about who we are and the values, goals and ideals we want to live by, the best version of us changes. It morphs. There is no perfect you at the end of the tunnel. There is just an ever evolving and growing you.

No one really knows their full potential. As you go through your personal development journey, you will continually amaze yourself. You’ll accomplish things you never even imagined you could five years earlier.

As you grow, learn, and experience more, your mind will expand. Your life will expand. You will discover and realize new possibilities, and new subjects you want to pursue. Your goals will grow and expand with you.

Five years ago, I didn’t realize the potential of where I’m at today. I didn’t even see the possibilities. The goals I set five years ago simply gave me a road map in order to move forward. In order to discover new possibilities and new opportunities. Just as the goals I’m working on right now today will lead me to discover new and exciting possibilities for who I am and who I become five years from now.

As you see the positive gains in your life from the efforts that you put in today, you will become more motivated and confident. What you believe you can achieve will change and grow along that journey.

That’s why it’s so important to enjoy every moment of this journey. If you wait until the final destination to enjoy your life and be happy, you’ll always be waiting. So don’t wait until you’re at the end of your life to realize this.

So what is the best version of you right now? Are you living your life to the best of your ability right now, at this moment? That is the real question you need to ask yourself.

Taking Action

According to what you know right now, do you take action on the things that you know you should be doing?

Or do you find yourself saying things like, I really need to… I should… I want… I’m sick of… I should have… I was going to… if I had more of…

If you find yourself making any of these statements, look at them like a key to figuring out where you need to focus your growth and where you need to start becoming the best version of you in.

Living your life according to the best version of you also means taking action. Not waiting, not putting off, not believing you can’t, not believing you can’t do or accomplish what’s really important to you right now. Not waiting for the perfect moment.

And like I said earlier, as you start living up to your full potential, the potential you have right now, according to who you are right now, that potential will grow and expand. New opportunities will surface. New doors will open up for you.

So focus on what the best version of you is right now. Start living up to your known potential today. As you grow and the best version of you grows, you’ll already be in the habit of taking action, and you’ll naturally flow into the next best version of yourself.

Discovering The Best Version Of You

So how do you discover what the best version of you is right now? You need to ask yourself:

• What vision do you have for yourself and your life right now?
• How do you want to feel?
• What do you want to do? What do you want to have?
• Do you want to be kinder?
• React less?
• Learn how to communicate without triggering others?
• Learn to communicate to be understood?
• Have a better relationship with your spouse or your children?
• Make new friends?
• Try new things?
• Leave a bad or abusive relationship?
• Get out of debt?
• Get a better job or education?
• Lose weight?
• Get in shape?
• Eat healthier?
• Travel the world?
• Help others?

What do you want?

Look at each area of your life and ask yourself what you want that area of your life to look like. Decide on one thing that you want to start working on and figure out a plan to get the results that you want. And then start taking action.

Maybe you’re getting stuck on the fact that you don’t know where to start or you don’t know the steps necessary to get the end result. Or maybe it seems too big or unattainable. Don’t worry, I’ll give you a solution for all of that.

The first thing you need to do is figure out the end result you want. Then just make yourself a list of everything that is creating any kind of obstacle for you getting that end result and then list out everything that you know right now that you’ll have to do to change it or create it in your life. Then write down some things that you can do to learn more about how to change or create that result in your life. write down the things that you can do to learn what you don’t know.

I’ll give you an example.

Let’s say that you want to have a better relationship with your children, So first, write down what your relationship with your children looks like right now. List out all of the problem areas and the positive areas in that relationship that you have with them. List out all the things that you find are things that are good about your relationship and also the things that you want to change or something you want to add to the relationship.

• Maybe you might have a teenager that you’re having communication problems with.
• Maybe you just simply want to spend more time with your children.
• Maybe you feel a little disconnected.
• If you have smaller children, you know it could be incorporating new things into your relationship that you haven’t had in the past.

I remember when my kids were small. One of the things that I wanted to start incorporating into our relationship more was telling them that I love them. It wasn’t easy for me to say those words, even though I felt them because of how I was raised in and the things that I experienced as a child. I didn’t know how to say I love you without feeling super weird, even with my kids. It wasn’t something that came naturally to me, but I wanted to be that kind of parent. I wanted to be the kind of parent, the kind of mother whose children knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that I love them.

So it might be something as simple as incorporating into your relationship new things, things that you want your kids to know and to feel.

Or, you know, sometimes when you have teenagers and they get busy with sports and after school jobs, you don’t see them as often. So things get lost by the wayside or you forget to do those things.

This is the case now with my 17 year old. You know we don’t spend as much time together. So one thing that I’m incorporating into our relationship is having a weekly time set aside for just her, for just us, for doing something together. Because she’s not going to be at home for too much longer. And I want to make sure that I spend that time cultivating our relationship and making it stronger and making it a priority.

Another thing that you might have on your list is, just being more present with your children. I think we all get into the habit of being distracted by life, by things like TVs, by phones. So that might be something that you want to start working on in your relationship with your children. Whatever it might be, go ahead and write that down.

Step one was to write down what your relationship with your children looks like right now.

Step two is to write down what you want your relationship with your children to look like. What you want that to feel like.

Now we’ll move on to step number three. This is a step where you can write down ideas of the things that you can do to start getting the desired results that you want in your relationship with your children. Like when my children were young and I wanted to start telling them I love them more, I just did it. Every day at a certain time, I created a habit of doing it until I felt comfortable doing it. And then, as it became more comfortable, I actually started to say it even more. If it’s something where you want to spend more quality time with your children, write down what those steps look like. Write down the steps that you can take to create that time together. Is it a certain amount of time per day certain time of the day that you want to solely focus on your relationship with your children? Or is it small things that you want to incorporate into your daily routine. Write those down. Create a plan for how you’re going to incorporate the new behaviors that you’re going to have to take to get your new results.

Now step number four is for anyone who’s not sure of the steps that they need to take in order to get those results. Step four basically is learn what you don’t know. If you’re not sure how to get the best result with communicating better with your children, let’s say, you might need to look elsewhere for information on that. You might need to take a class or read a book to get some ideas on different things you can try in order to get that result that you want. You might need to, if you have a strained relationship with your child, you might need to even seek counseling so that you can both learn how to bridge that gap. So number four is to learn what you don’t know. Learn what you don’t know in order to create the results that you want.

Number five is to make it a priority. Schedule it into your day or your week, depending on what it is that you want. Whatever’s scheduled into your time is a priority. Whatever you don’t schedule into your time and make a plan for, you’re going to tend to forget because life happens. And then you go a whole week and think, Dang I was gonna… I should have… So in order to keep that from happening, make sure that you prioritize your plan to get your new result and start moving toward it. Start taking the action even if it’s a small action to start. Start taking actions toward the result that you want.

This process may seem simple, but it’s very effective. So many times, we get stuck dwelling on the problem, and the solution seems unattainable or insurmountable. But these five simple steps you can use to create anything new in your life. To creating and moving toward the best version of you. Many times, it’s the simple solutions that are most effective. But they’re also the ones that seem to get overlooked the most.

So make it simple.

1. See where you are right now.
2. Create a vision of the change that you want to make.
3. Break it down into small, simple steps.
4. Learn what you don’t know.
5. Make it a priority in your life and start moving forward to it. And start moving toward that result you want.

You can use this in creating any goal that you want in your life. Any goal that you want to attain, whether it’s having a better relationship with your children, like we discussed or losing weight or traveling the world. This could be used to create any result that you want for your life. So I encourage you to try it out.

Pick one thing and start working on it. Start moving forward.

Well, that’s it for today. I hope you join me next week where we will be discussing running from vs running toward. Those two things are your motivation in life. You’re either running toward something or running from something. So we’ll discuss more about that next week.

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Have a great week. Bye for now